WAYNE & SALLY & ANTHONY & KELLI. The story so far: Sally's football star husband Wayne slept with Kelli, who is married to Anthony, who is Wayne's best friend and team mate.
Like sand through the hourglass, so are the days of their lives. Here's the latest from Australia's national soap opera:
Wayne's friends are so sneaky and dumb. And they lie. They'll do anything to get Wayne out of trouble.
Anthony visits Kelli. What will he do? What will Kelli say? Will they get back together? What about their poor baby? And will the various newspapers ever agree on how Kelli (or Kellie, or Kelly) spells her name?
Oh no! Wayne is crying his eyes out.
Wayne and Sally were fated to be together. Their small-town romance was perfect! Can they possibly recapture their love?
Wayne is in a hell of his own creation. Can he free himself? Will he sink even lower? Nobody knows.
Sally speaks! She's still upset and stressed, even after all the sedatives.
What will Wayne do next? Will he ever play football again? What team would take him?
Sally returns to her childhood home, where her grouchy father has been seething for days. How will the old man react? Will the sight of his betrayed daughter provoke an attack on Wayne?
Have pity on the football wives. All the time, conniving bitches are trying to steal their men! How do they cope?
Leave Wayne alone, says Wayne's brother. He needs some privacy. Go home, Satan's minions!
Will Wayne ever learn that doing the wrong thing is bad?
Who's that shadowy figure lurking in the background? It's a private eye! Football wives are hiring them to spy on their husbands!
Wayne has brought shame not only on himself, but on the entire world of Australian football! Everyone is tainted.
Can Anthony's brother Michael play football after all the stress of Anthony's ordeal? His coach hopes he can.
There will be more tomorrow. And for weeks afterwards.